It's Me. Hi. I'm the Problem, It's Me.

I have been kicking around the idea for a while of starting a blog. I don't really have any goals or aspirations with this platform, but I have had a need to get my thoughts to paper (or in this case, the interwebs) for a while. I can't really say if it's for catharsis, or connection, or just a place to house the experiences and thoughts that run rampant through my overactive brain each day so they can have a rest.

I turned 44 this year in a sea of raging, unpredictable hormones, and I have felt a little disconnected from my previous self. And outside looking in, I have a great life. I have an amazing guy who loves me in heels or in a bathrobe. I have 2 of the cutest, loudest, loyal doggies (Max and Snuffy) one could ever ask for. I have amazing friends who have been my ride or dies for too long to mention. I have a family that, although not anyone's version of a Norman Rockwell painting, loves me unconditionally. I have a great job that keeps me interested and challenged and pays the bills. So why, at this time in my life, when everything seems to be on the up and up am I feeling a little lost and alone?

I can only quote the words of the wise Taylor Swift when I say "It's Me. Hi. I'm the problem, it's me." There is something that has shifted in me over the past few years that has screamed "Is this it???" It feels like I've entered an era in which I'm not even sure if I have dreams anymore, let alone know if I could even muster up the energy to make them a reality. Honestly, most days it feels like a stretch to even want to brush my hair. So over the next little bit, as long as I have storage on this free platform (you should all know right away that I'm a cheap bitch who will not pay for anything as silly as a blog about myself) and the urge to write, I'm going to try to put my wayward and chaotic thoughts down. I'm not sure what the result will be. Most likely no one will read it, and that's also fine. But I'm hoping maybe, just maybe, you'll learn more about me, I'll learn more about you, and maybe I'll learn a little more about myself and what the hell I'm going to do for the rest of my life.

I'm not sure what topics I'll cover but, as per the title, I am 100% sure I will be waxing poetic at some point about the antics of my doggies, ranting about the true evil that is perimenopause, and maybe letting people in to my little world a little bit. I don't know how much I'll share. I'm sure sometimes it will be too vague, sometimes too much of an overshare, and sometimes just downright boring. Jane Austen level, this will not be. But if you are willing to sit through my ramblings, we can go on this little journey together. All aboard the Hot Mess Express!